I want to move forward but I am stuck.
I want to provide my husband what he needs as he grieves, but I am stuck.
I want to be stronger than I am, but I am stuck.
Paralyzed by fear.
Consumed by my own neurosis.
Burrowed deep in my comfort zone of weakness.
This is how I feel.
Yet, I don’t want to dwell on these feelings. I don’t want to be mired by fear, neurosis, and weakness.
I want to be unstuck. But wanting just isn’t enough.
It has finally stopped raining here in the sunshine state. I think we need to get out and do something as a family. No matter how fragile we feel separately, perhaps together we can grow stronger.
I want to be unstuck. I will take this small step.
But my family says no.
My husband waved me away when I made the suggestion. My daughter begged for a few more hours of sleep.
I want to be unstuck. But I can’t do it alone.
Can I?
Should I?
How?
10 Comments
*hugs* Step out and take a little step toward being unstuck on your own. If you take care of YOU it’ll make it easier to take care of them.
I’m praying that you can, and will, get unstuck fast! But I am also praying for the entire grief process. If you can, I suggest you get the little book called, Good Grief by Granger Westberg. We used to keep these stockpiled to share with friends when they experienced loss. It is an amazing little book….very short….yet very insightful. Here is a link: http://cgi.ebay.com/Good-Grief-by-Granger-E-Westberg-1997_W0QQitemZ150276263170QQihZ005QQcategoryZ378QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem
This is also a book that would be good for your husband and your daughter to read.
Hugs,
Susan
Everyone grieves in different ways and at different rates. You go for a walk or go to the beach or your favorite nature preserve. Take the steps for yourself and don’t force them to do what makes you feel better. Then, while you are starting to unstick, watch to see how they chose to unstick themselves as well. Praying for you.
I don’t know of any way to comfort you, but I will pray.
I can’t really add anything different, but it’s important to take care of yourself first. Only by being where you need to be will you be able to be where your family needs you to be.
Grieving is an individual thing and everyone grieves at their own speed. Perhaps by taking the first steps toward healing you’ll be able to set an example, or be the motivation, for your family to begin the process.
Hugs, Danielle. You and your family remain in my thoughts.
You can get unstuck yourself. Then you will be able to help them. You are all struggling with really hard things. Take care of you. I’ll be praying.
What was your idea to become “unstuck”?
Danielle, so sorry for your loss. I was going to say. Get them up out of bed, Don’t let your hubby wave you away, till, I read some of the other comments here. Cathy S. is right. We all grieve in our way, and each family member will do so, regardless, of your well meant suggestions. HOWEVER, as one who forgot to STOP grieving for my mothers passing, and lots of counseling, You do what YOU, have to do, in that respect, you save yourself in your grief, and we can all just pray that the other family members, see by your example, that life MUST go on, and that Grandpa, would NEVER want this for any of you, and somehow, in a frame of mind, that in essence, in Respect of Dad, Grandpa, getting on with LIFE is the only way to show him all the deep felt love, you all had for him. I surely hope this makes sense, as I do have a hard time, putting my thoughts into words. Hugs! Kat
I have always said, “Get unstuck” but that is too simplistic isn’t it. If my family doesn’t want to do what I want to do I usually go ahead and do it anyway but that irritates my hubby because he says he has to do everything I want to do cause if he doesn’t I am going to do it anyway, LOL,I know that makes him sound abusive but trust me he isn’t. I have put him through the mill including my hospital visit when I went crazy so trust me he isn’t abusive he is right by my side whether he likes it or not. Thank you dear sweet Jesus for all my supportive dear friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!